What did you feel when you were speaking with Odin? Did you feel euphoria? Fear? Excitement? Guilt?…

Concerning the Ragnarök in your vision: what is everyone defending? What is the threat, and what must be protected? Is it the same as the classic Norse interpretation: the forces of chaos are coming to loose the bonds of law and logic that hold the world together?

And yes, it was the same Ragnarök as in the classic stories. We were defending human civilization, both in the symbolic sense (law, compassion, logic, industry, etc.,) and in a very real sense… There were people there to be defended… All of humanity.

And yes, it was an open wound. It still is, in some respect. I only found my bitterness for religion by ripping off the scab. It probably isn’t the best idea to go poking around… but at the same time, certain wounds get worse when untreated, and this is a wound that I had allowed to sit for quite a while.

I talked with Odin again, last night. After he brought me to tears again (and this time, I was the one driving), I asked where the peace from religion comes from. He said it comes from knowing your going to do the right thing, and it comes after you have done the right thing.

In other words, peace comes from within. Religion has nothing to do with peace, unless that religion tells you to do what is right.

I’m at peace with Ragnarök… I know where I’ll be and what I’ll do. In a sense, confronting religion has brought me a sense of peace, although it isn’t the all-encompassing peace that the Christians describe.

Perhaps it is time for me to speak with the Prince of Peace again and see what insight he can share.

I can feel the raw emotional force that you are expressing through this subject. You say you are in a crisis, but you said yourself that faith gets stronger with each scrap you shed.

When the shallow surface of religion dissapears, what is left? only the core purpose, which is probably much more authentic than an elaborate structure that does nothing but cover up the deeper issues.

“Each soldier and each general had swords at their sides, and the ones informing the generals each had daggers and flowers.”

Why flowers, I wonder? (Dare you ask?) And what kind[s] of flowers?

The flower is the Oriental Blue Rose (which doesn’t grow naturally… The only way to make one is to take a white or cream colored oriental rose and add blue pigment to the water).

It is an old symbol of secrecy, partially because the method of creating an oriental blue rose remained secret for so long, and partly because flowers were a symbol of diplomacy, where diplomats were often the first people to gather information about foreign nations, making them de-facto spies.

When adding a symbol for the sun, we get the Military Intelligence crest… The dagger representing a hidden danger both from and towards intelligence collectors. The sun represents the ability to see all from a great distance. The flower, as explained above, represents secrecy.

Vitor:

The problem that I’m having with faith seems to be the same kind when attacking the ego head-on. When I “defeat” my ego, I’m acting through a different layer of my ego… It might be a deeper layer, closer to true consciousness, but then again, it might not be. In the end, I end up circling consciousness without actually getting any closer, because each time I sidestep the ego, there’s another aspect of the ego waiting for me.

Accepting the ego gets me closer to consciousness… I’m stepping forward to embrace it, and it has to retreat closer to consciousness in order to stay in control. The same seems to be happening with faith… so long as I don’t get tricked into standing still, but I have been sidestepping faith for so long, trying to look at the truth behind it, and I’ve found myself further outside than when I started looking.

It is time to try accepting faith, although the tendency with that is to find a comfortable spot and close your eyes… to stop advancing.

Ragnarok is fascinating to me. WHY must the gods (and Order and human civilization) be defeated? Why do they lose?

The only answer I can think of comes from Buddhism.

The Norse tales are quite explicit: at Ragnarok, all the ties that bind the world together are broken: Yggdrasil cracks, the sky splinters, all knots untie and ropes unravel (including the otherworldly strand that binds Fenrir), and promises and oaths are broken, as well. So what are all these knots, ropes, fetters, promises, and such? They are attachments, aren’t they?…

And Buddhism is all about releasing attachments, of course. So in Buddhist terms, the gods and heroes must lose in the end, because they are defending worldly attachments, even such things as honor and order; these things are simply mortal; they are time-bound and will end in time. The peaceful, enlightened mind would sit serenely as Ragnarok swirled around, unattached to any outcome. And interestingly enough, after Ragnarok, the heir of Odin, Balder, returns from Hel to rule in (what’s left of) Asgard. Balder is the god of light, and light, in all Indo-European cultures (including Hindu and Norse), light is a metaphor for enlightenment.

So maybe the legend of Ragnarok is a reflection of Buddhist thought. Or maybe I’ve been drinking too many raw-egg protein shakes…

What makes Christianity so special that they “win”?

I can only think of one possibility: When the trumpets call, the gates of heaven are sealed, effectively removing heaven from the rest of the universe.

The reason why a person must be perfect in order to enter heaven is to keep the attachments with the rest of the universe from leaving that gate open… Effectively, the Christian God is saying that it is every man/god for themselves, and in order to protect Himself, He is only allowing those into His kingdom who won’t be a threat to Him when the final trumpet calls.

Though I might live forever, in that sense, I would definitely choose a different place to be than the Christian heaven. Only those with the strongest and most servile egos would go there when the battle begins. I’d rather my ego be destroyed on the battlefield, than to know of egos being destroyed that I can’t help.

Damaging the ego is the source of suffering. When Ragnarök comes, it seems that a lot of egos will be quickly destroyed, leading to much suffering… I don’t know if I can bring myself to stand by while suffering happens. It seems that my choice is to lead as many people to a peaceful release of their egos as possible, then protect those who will not release their egos, giving people a little extra time to choose to release them peacefully.

Hopefully, that will be the last thread of my ego, and when I’ve done all I can, it will be easy to release that thread myself.

Many lifetimes would pass… and I’m not just accepting of that, I get joy from that idea.

I want to share something with you my wife said a couple of nights ago. She was struck by how powerful your writing was, and how vividly you described your emotions and visions. I think she’s absolutely right, and the two of us think you totally deserve to find a way to live off your writing. Voices like yours are too rare.

For once, I think I’m without meaningful words. That is an incredibly high compliment to give, and you have left me speechless. This is definitely a good thing.

If I do write a science fiction novel, I’ll call it the Lilly Effect.